Virtual Festival

Today, I have been largely at a literary festival.

I know, we’re not supposed to go anywhere, and I didn’t, it was all on-line.  Me and a load of other writers getting together thanks to Showboat TV and talking about our writing.  And in my case my editing too.

We’re talking about our books, old and new, and reading segments of the book.  It made me think that I should read a snippet of each of my books and stick them on my website too, but to do that I’d actually have to listen to me and that is so cringe-worthy I’m not sure I could.

With lockdown, I’m actually finding that there are advantages to on-line literary festivals.  For a start, I don’t have to travel.  Now don’t get me wrong – I LOVE travelling, but it takes up a lot of time, can be uncomfortable and stressful.  It means staying in places you don’t know and buying food you can’t be certain of.

On-line means I only have to travel from one end of the house to the other – and it really isn’t that big a house. I get the comfort of my own chair, let alone my own bed at night, and I can have whatever food I want.  Today I made a jambalaya and it was lovely – and it meant that the place smelt great for the afternoon when I did the second slot.

More importantly, it meant that I got to met up with some old writer pals I’ve not seen in ages because we usually met up at festivals and book fairs and of course, we haven’t had any of those for a year.

So if you’d like to hear what’s going on with writing in Wales, check out www.showboat.tv as they will be putting recordings of the day up on their site.  See how we writers can put words on the page, but can’t always read them out.  😉

Daily

Started this daily blogging because of feeling low and with lockdown, it was something regular to focus on. I’ve noticed that now I’m feeling mentally better, and I’m back into the swing of writing, that I’m missing days because I’m just so busy that I forget to blog. I’m also finding that after a full day of computer work, I want to turn it off more of the evening.

So, as lockdown starts to lift, which will mean I’ve even more things to do, I am going to keep blogging, but not feel bad if I miss a day or two.

Today has already been busy, I had to go out to take parcels to be returned to Amazon (weird thing is I think the Amazon depot is actually closer to me than the drop off point), and gone to a the supermarket, as well as deciding not to go into another shop because the queue outside in the rain was too long. Got writing, ironing and family stuff to fill the rest of the day with.

I am glad lockdown is starting to ease, but the only place I really want to go is 80 miles away, to visit our son. I’m not sure if things have eased that much, especially since it means crossing the Welsh-English border.

I am looking forward to tonight, though. We’re having chicken wings and homemade pizza and watching “EuroVision”. While I would generally avoid a Will Farrell film like the plague, I’ve heard good things about this one, and am prepared to give it a go.  This is also the reason for the early blog today.

Have a good weekend, all.

Meh

Today I stayed in bed till 2pm.  Haven’t done that in a long time.  Yes, some of it was to do with a hangover, but most of it was just feeling ‘meh’. Been feeling that way for a couple of days, not ill, just a little under the weather.

So today has been a bit of a downer.  Did go for a walk, though I have to say doing that same loop is getting really old, but any alternative would be a there and back, and almost all urban, not fields or woods.

Unfortunately, I haven’t even had to oomph to do any writing today.  Just not feeling it. Not creating it. 

Think it may be missing the fact that we should have been away this weekend and we’re not. I’ve been in the house since 9^th March, yes the 9^th, not the 23^rd when everyone else was locked down. My mental health hit suicidal on the 8^th, and I just couldn’t go on, so leaving the house for those two weeks wasn’t going to happen. It all means that I’ve only been out to go to Tesco, drop my daughter to work, and some short walks. Don’t even do those every day, or even one of them every day.

Sorry on a bit of a downer tonight, so going to sign off now and hope that I wake up in a better mood tomorrow.

Stay safe.

Stupid

Today has not been the best. I am so sick of the selfishiness of the general population.  The First Ministers of Wales, Scotland and Northern Ireland have all said that lockdown is to continue for another three weeks, and that idiot Prime Minister of England loosens everything, leading to confusion and to the stupid breaking lockdown for the rest of us. Never mind that over 30,000 people have died in the first wave and that the second wave is bound to be worse.

Since I’ve only been out of the house to go to Tesco for the last week, went for a walk with my hubby today.  Usual route, not too many people out.  Most – but not all – giving space.   Got home and sat down, then dozed on the sofa.  It’s not like me to have an afternoon nap, which is a stupid move because it tends to mean that I won’t sleep tonight, but there again I have been awake since four this morning. 

I didn’t want to be, I just was, and I got up with a sore throat. My sinuses filled with hay fever, and the only eye has been running all day.  Luckily, I recognise that this is hay fever nothing more serious.  I did take the vitamins, (and eventually an antihistamine), got dressed, and sat down to write. I’ve managed 2k words today, which is a good achievement.

Dressing

Depression makes simple things really difficult, including getting up.  I’ve had a few days when that hasn’t been easy.  Today wasn’t one of those days. Today I got up reasonably early, but I also made sure that I got dressed.

I’ve seen lots of memes about people wearing their ‘day-time pyjamas’, so it’s become a thing not to dress in the day. I’m also aware of previous (years ago) complaints from schools about parents in PJs dropping kids off at school and there are cases of supermarkets banning people wearing nightwear to go shopping. I’ve never done either of those things, closest I got was wearing my slippers because I forgot to change shoes – thankfully my slippers are Merrills, so they aren’t that embarrassing.

When I was first off, and usually when not working, I like to be in sweatpants and jumpers, I don’t look good in them and I feel ‘slobby’. That kind of goes with being depressed, but I’m trying to get out of depression, and I’m trying various things to help myself. And this one is such a simple thing. I got dressed.

I got properly dressed, in a skirt and a nice top.  I didn’t look good in it, because I’ve allowed myself to get too fat.  However, I did feel better for making the effort.  So clearly, it’s an effort that I’m going to have to keep up.

Also, on a political note, I usually don’t think much of the Welsh Assembly, but today I was really glad to see the First Minister Mark Drakeford being up front and saying that lockdown will not be lifted next week.  Hopefully that means we won’t see too many selfish fools trying to get into Wales on the Easter Bank Holiday.

Stay home, stay safe – support the NHS.

My First Apocalypse

While I am signed off and on lockdown, both my husband and daughter work shifts in businesses considered essential (different businesses, different shifts).  Today though, we’ve all been home. That means that it feels like a weekend. It also means I’ve been distracted from my editing, but that’s been nice.

We’ve been talking about how differently this household under lockdown is to what a lot of people seem to be experiencing. When not signed off, I work Monday to Friday, now I’m home all the time it largely feels like life as per a long weekend.

Listening to the advice for what to do during lockdown has included a lot of “get into crafting”, and being us we all reacted with “No, because you told me to.” That said, I have been doing needle work, pottering in the garden, and helping my daughter make her Harley Quinn “Birds of Prey” cosplay outfit, teaching her how to use the sewing machine.

We’re just the type of people who don’t follow the crowd. We are of course following all the covid19 advise to stay home, shop only when necessary, stay socially distant – but that last we’ve been trying for decades.

As my husband said today “it’s my first apocalypse, I’m figuring it out as I go.”

Guess that’s what we’ve all got to do now, figure it out as we go.